Evie: Two Months
I can’t believe Evie is already 2 and a half months old!
She:
Literally looks bigger every time I turn around! It’s crazy that some of the pajamas she had when she was a newborn don’t even fit anymore. I’m already giving clothes away!
Is becoming more and more alert and aware- she laughs in response to things now, and makes squealing noises in an effort to laugh out loud. It is so precious. She gets really excited when we talk to her, and kicks her legs, and coos and “talks” back. The noises she makes are pretty hilarious.
Is impossible to catch on video, because every time she is doing something cute and I stick my iPhone near her face, she gets really quiet and just stares intently at the phone. So much for candid camera 
Weighs 10.5 pounds now. Again, just amazed at how this little one is growing so fast. I’m really going to have to get back in the gym so that I can bulk up for when she doubles her weight within the year.
Loves being in the Moby Wrap. She sleeps so soundly when she is right next to me- it’s wonderful. She breathes so deeply and even snores a little.
Just received a new rocker seat, and absolutely loves the toys that hang from it. I think she could talk to them for hours. She also has a serious crush on our ceiling fan. They chat all the time.
Is starting to get better head and neck control- it’s so cute seeing her look around and engage with her environment.
I:
Am getting more sleep these days, which is wonderful!
Started a new part-time job with Nashville Public Radio last week. I am so blessed to have my family and Matt’s family here in town, so the Grandmas are watching her. My first day away from her was tough, but thankfully I really enjoy my new job and they are super flexible and understanding that I am a new mom. I’m really excited about being a part of the WPLN team!
Didn’t know how I would feel about going back to work, but I am actually grateful for some “adult” time out of the house. It also makes a big difference to know that it’s only three days per week and I can spend most of my time with Evie. I used to dread commuting, but now it is a nice little “me” time where I can just pray or listen to a podcast. Or, let’s be real: jam out to some REALLY loud music.
Am finally getting the hang of pumping at work. At first it was a little awkward, but now things are going very smoothly thanks to the help of a few of my coworkers! (They secured a nice private spot for me)
Feel like I am finally out of the “newborn haze” and am getting the hang of this. Of course, I know as soon as that happens something new will come up. I’m just so happy to have her in my life!
New Hilary Barnett Coaching Website!
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Confessions of A New Mom.
Waiting for Dad to get out of work. (the car was parked, I promise)
As with most things in life, there is only so much advice someone can offer- you just have to experience it for yourself to truly understand. I find that it is this way with motherhood. No matter how many women in my life told me what it was like- the good, the bad and the ugly, I just didn’t get it until I experienced it myself. So here I am, on the other side of pregnancy and childbirth. I am now a bonafide “mommy”. And how does it feel? To be honest, wonderful. And terrifying. And exhausting. And indescribably beautiful.
Let’s just say it’s a game changer.
Never in my life did I think something could push me so far to the end of myself. Never did I think I could love someone so much that demanded so much from me. I didn’t know how much I had to give, until she came into the world and opened up the depths of my capacity for love, patience, and sleeplessness. There were at least a handful of nights where I sobbed, and sobbed. Literally feeling that I could simply not survive another moment without sleep. (let’s make note here, that I am one of those who NEEDS my sleep. Definitely not one of those moms who “just loves” those 4am feedings). There were nights when I resented her for needing me so much. Nights when I just wanted my solitude back, for one moment. Nights when I felt things that were the furthest from motherly love, and mornings full of guilt for those feelings.
But in the morning… she would smile. She would look up at me. And every moment of sleeplessness wouldn’t matter anymore. It was as though there was a cosmic “reset” button on every moment. My heart would just overflow with love all over again. I would remember how much I prayed for her, pleaded with God for her, the tears I cried in the night, just wishing for her to come into my life. I would remember that I am her world, that she needs me, and only me right now. And that makes me feel so special.
Babies have a way of forcing you to live in the moment. And I need that. There is no planning, no checklist, no measurement of efficiency and productivity. You just have now. This moment, this opportunity to be with them, love them, hold them, be their security, their protection. I have had to let go of my need for a perfectly clean house, a completed task list, and a sense of worldly achievement. For now, none of that matters. God has given me a gift, and I would be a fool to not stop and completely relish each moment, to the best of my ability. Because as every mother has told me, “they grow up so fast”. But I guess I’ll have to wait and experience that too. For now, I will just hold her, and smother her with kisses at every possible chance. Because that’s what you do with a gift- you cherish it.
Evie: One Month
With inspiration from Ashley’s blog, I decided to do a monthly “Evie update”. This is partially for me, to record things that I will most likely forget someday, and for those out there who are interested in the development of this precious little one. Thanks to my bestie Danielle for making her these monthly onesies!
She:
Has completely stolen my heart. I honestly was not a kid or baby person prior to this. I keep marveling at how I just wasn’t that excited about babies- they just seemed like little blobby humans that squirmed and pooped and cried. But having one of your own changes everything. I know her little personality already! Her funny faces, her laughs, smiles, and her “I’m pooping” face. Which is actually amusing to me. Who knew this little human could turn me and her dad into mushy balls of mushness.
Is laughing and smiling all the time now. Every morning when we wake up, we spend at least ten minutes just cracking up in each other’s faces. She is actually making little coo and squeal noises now, which makes it even more awesome. She does this with her dad as well!
Gets excited and starts breathing really heavily and spastically kicking her leg. This is also hilarious.
Loves to stare at colorful things and lights. She gets happy and laughs at them. I put her in front of a picture of Ray Charles the other day, and they had a lovely little conversation. She was mesmerized. Hey, gotta start her off early with the musical greats.
Smiles in her sleep, and when I sing to her. This makes me the happiest person on the planet.
Stares intently at people’s faces, and checks them out. This kid is focused.
Is starting to sleep in her crib and bassinet- the first few weeks home, she would simply sleep nowhere but right next to me. This made me nervous, as I had heard about the “dangers of cosleeping”, but after talking to some folks and doing a little research, I learned that it’s not as bad as people think. It can actually help regulate the baby’s breathing patterns and heart rate at night. I just needed to get sleep, and so we did what we had to do. But now when she falls asleep in her bassinet, I still hold her hand. I might miss her just a little. She is quite snuggly.
Has been one amazing little traveler. She sleeps in her car seat better than anywhere. Matt loves taking her out and about, it is their bonding time. He actually took her to the mall on Christmas Eve! Crazy, I know. She has already been to my work, several coffee shops around town, the pediatrician a few times, our small group, and my friend’s 30th birthday party! Here’s to getting out of the house.
I:
Am healing really well from surgery. I had a doctor appointment yesterday, and I am all clear to return to normal activities. I was already driving (ssshh), but now I can go back to the gym, which makes me very happy.
Have three more weeks left of maternity leave, and am wondering how in the world I am going to spend any time away from this precious girl. I guess I will have to cross that bridge when I come to it. For now, I am enjoying this special time together and just living in the moment.
Am loving cloth diapering! Not as hard as I thought it would be, thanks to the help of a good friend who held my hand in the beginning and showed me what to buy and how to put them on her.
Am getting more sleep than I thought at this point. There have been some super rough nights with many tears (on my part and hers), but she is now sleeping up to four hours in between nighttime feedings. What a champ.
Am so excited to watch how this little one grows!
For more pictures of Evie’s first month, click here.
To listen to her playlist on Spotify, click here.
